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| (Claire, this is for you, and for our possible upcoming story)
Many times do I find myself thinking...hoping that one day I'll look through the window, and see you looking back at me.
Many times I find myself pondering about all those moments we shared together, only to see that while they meant the world to me, they meant nothing but ashes to you.
It's curious though, how despite of the pain...how in spite of feeling invisible when I'm with you, I still wonder about when we'll be together again.
Ironic, isn't it? Why, I think it is. And also, isn't it stupid that even though I know your smile is going to break me even more, I still ache to be with you? I find it completely idiotic, and yet it's so painfully true. And the truth is that I'm still waiting.
I'm still waiting for the day when you'll look at me and actually see me.
But until that moment comes, I will force myself to raise my chin, and observe how you treat her the way I wish you would treat me. Perhaps this may look as if I'm jealous, but truth is that all I wish is for the day you will smile for me, and truly mean that smile.
For now I'll continue to watch you from the shadows, hoping for the day when I'll see you looking back at me.
Until then, goodbye.
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| There is an ancient proverb that says "love is blind, but friendship closes its eyes". And the only thing I can say is; how truthful those words are.
Sometimes, to make someone happy, we ourselves have to be determined to go through the pain that most people don't wish to go through. Occasionally, in order to offer a smile to a heartbroken friend, we need to make choices, and sometimes open our arms, and receive all sort of sadness and grief just to make sure our friend will be able to smile again.
And every so often, we silently decide to keep our own problems...our own despair...our depression in the darkness all because a friend simply decided to call us, pouring out his heart in a desperate quest to find a little bit of balance in his life. And while we try so hard to wipe our friend's tears away, our own roll down our soul only to be bury in the depths of our own desolation.
Friendship is about putting others above yourself. Friendship is about keeping those we care about close to our heart, and make sure they are always happy even if that means having to make personal sacrifices. But that's supposed to be always worth it...right?
I believe it's not wrong to think that way, though sometimes carrying other people's burdens while we try to deal with our own can be extremely tiresome. However, it's always good to think that at the end it's always worth it...to see a dear friend trading tears for a wide smile is always worthwhile.
Even if we are breaking on the inside.
- The Voice of my Heart:gloomy
 - The Sound of my Spirit:Ai Otsuka - Planetarium
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| It is magical how one simple page has the capability of giving you wings, and carry you to another world. It is amazing how one simple book is capable of opening new doors, and to take you to new horizons that you probably never dreamed of before.
It is also fantastic how there are so many things in this world that can be cherished and loved. The sky, the ocean, the trees, the clouds...all of those resemble to windows that deserve to be opened. The wind is also something that should be treasured for it occasionally tickles one's mind, and whispers new words that may, in the future, be used to describe a scenery that we pictured when we looked at the sun or at the moon and stars.
Books carry the fading words of imagination, and sing the perfect lullaby of dreams that have yet to be dreamed.
Books offer the getaway that so many desperately try to hold onto, but the question is, are we ready to lose ourselves in a world where not all can go? - My Creative Lair:Lost in Words
- The Voice of my Heart:nostalgic
 - The Sound of my Spirit:Kamenashi Kazuya - Kizuna
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| ...It seemed as if all that mattered was the way the sky and the ocean seemed to cuddle at the horizon...
...It seemed as if all that mattered was how the wind danced with the trees, creating the most beautiful of all melodies...
...It seemed as if all that mattered were the hushed tones of the moon and stars as they sang their lullaby into the night...
...It seemed as if all that mattered was how you listened to my shattered words...
...It seemed as if all that mattered was you...
....The Ivory Castle... - The Voice of my Heart:melancholy
 - The Sound of my Spirit:'Ai Mei' - Rainie Yang
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